This originally started as a blog of trying to address one aspect of the game community, but it was too scattered. After having it up for a few days I came back to clean up my thoughts and grammar and decided to make it more focused. If you’ve read this before, there’s more changes near the middle and end.
Hello again, for anyone who may be reading this. It’s been over a year since I tried my hand at blogging and a lot has happened. While there were many things on my mind as the year rolled by, I never got around to writing anything down for a number of reasons; mostly laziness, another being school is taking up a lot of my energy. So here I am, trying my hand at this again and hoping I’ll be coherent in my rambling; as well as maybe getting around to writing more of these. Now before I begin, I’m gonna go into some background on what’s led me up to how I am when it comes to videogames.
I grew up in a small town called Needles, California, in the middle of the Mojave Desert; the population is small and the summer weather is extreme. On top of being a small town, I lived on the outskirts and there was only one other family with kids near my age group. My mother worked the railroad; while it paid well, it required her to be gone a lot, and the hours were random instead of being routine. I had a few friends at school, but since my mother was gone a lot and I lived so far away from them, there were rarely house visits or anything with them. We moved to a new town when I was eight years old, we stayed there for three years before we moved back to Needles. I did make a few friends, but again, due to her work and not living in the right location friend visits were sparse except for a good friend I made.
Outside of the home I was shy and unsure of myself. While I can’t blame it all on the people around me, it goes without saying I wasn’t very popular when it came to school. Even from a young age I was bullied and made fun of, because I found myself enjoying videogames more than Micro Machines or whatever was hip and cool at the time. This didn’t change as I got older or changed schools either; I was still a nerd or a dork, and the insults only got worse as I got older. Dork turned into loser, loser turned into never have a girlfriend, which turned into virgin for life. Then on April 20th, 1999, the unthinkable happened; two troubled teens shot up their school in Columbine, Colorado. The media would go on to paint the game “Doom” as a reason for their rampage. Despite being hundreds of miles away, in a different state, I was promptly interrogated by my school’s principal about how I feel, why I don’t have many friends, and how many videogames I play. I was 14 years old when that happened, so not only was I an outcast; I was an outcast that nobody wanted to be nice to because I was now perceived to be dangerous. My next three years of high-school didn’t exactly go swimmingly either. Granted they weren’t as bad as they could’ve been, but I had to walk on egg-shells to even make graduation; all while students and faculty used everything they could to harass and humiliate me.
Now while it was horrible, there were moments of levity in my life. One of the best being when I could play a game and get my mind off all the shit that’s happened. I never had many friends (and still don’t), but what I did have was the arcade. Granted being in a small town, the only arcade cabinets were at the local pizzeria; but there was also Laughlin, Nevada, with a dozen casinos and each one had their own separate arcade. My family used to take routine trips up there to go to the cinema and see whatever was playing; without even checking to see what was on. The arcade was literally right next to where you bought the tickets for the theatre; so whenever there was some downtime, I knew where I was going to be. Now keep in mind as I moved around and times changed, there were different arcades I visited. The great thing was, that no matter which one I went to, certain things seemed universal regardless of where you are; and what I’m talking about to be exact is the community.
What I found most enjoyable about the arcade community is; your looks don’t matter, your gender doesn’t matter, your hair doesn’t matter, your clothes don’t matter, any of your physical attributes don’t fucking matter. All that matters is how much damage you can do when you put a quarter in a machine and hit start… and after you chose your character, game depending. You could be the ugliest 300+ pound motherfucker in the room, and you could have respect. You could be a screechy voiced 12 year old virgin, and you could have respect. I’m not saying that it was perfect; because when you look at arcades, you should realize that most of it is based on competition. It doesn’t matter if it was single play, cooperative play, or competitive play; every machine had a scoreboard, and if you were good enough you could put your three character moniker and claim your spot. The competitive games were of course more intense and there were plenty of times fights would happen due to tempers running hot. What happened afterwards depends on how known you were, and being known didn’t require you to be good. Someone could be a bag of ass, but if they continued to show up and try you’d not only have respect, you had a family; a family that may not know shit about you, but they’d go to blows for you if the situation called for it.
So why am I reminiscing about all this? Because I’m fucking sick of all the shit I see being done in the name of videogames and the communities surrounding them.
It doesn’t matter where I go now-a-days without hearing about some form of bullshit from either community members or the websites that masquerade as journalism sources. I tried playing League of Legends a few times; I found out that my mother is a massive whore and I should’ve been aborted. When I need to kill braincells and don’t want to drink alcohol, I play a bit of Call of Duty; turns out my mother isn’t just a massive whore, but she apparently prefers pre-teens who haven’t hit puberty. I don’t know how people argue or talk shit now-a-days outside of the internet, but I remember there was the adage “Say it to my face.” This goes along with someone talking shit when you’re not around, or maybe say it in front of you but muffle it so they get the satisfaction of saying it in front of you, but without you hearing. Now I imagine there are various interpretations, but to me it means, “Say it loud enough for me to hear and let me be within arms reach of you when you say it, bitch.”
Now this of course goes along with the advancement of the internet. Unfortunately with the advancement of being able to play people from around the world, it’s taken away the human interaction aspect and devolved into a lack of respect for anyone except yourself. No seriously, think about it for a moment. How many times have you consistently proven you’re a better player; only to have some obnoxious shit throw every insult imaginable at you and claim you suck. How many times, seriously? There’s no longer a handshake, fistbump, or whatever with a “Good game.” It’s all about what a cheap little bitch you are, or you’re a fucking loser who needs to get a life. Now granted, you play with friends you’re gonna trash talk and feelings aren’t gonna get involved; but those are your friends, your rivals, your family. Some random on the internet saying that shit, it goes without saying a good bitch-slapping would be in order. As I said before, that’s the internet and unfortunately there’s not a lot that can be done about it; but the internet has also given rise to a lot more then just bad manners.
Within the past few years or so there’s been a surge of feminism in the videogame community; whether it’s random community members or website journalists/writers. It seems to have risen mostly with Anita Sarkeesian appearing and her video series which she still hasn’t completed. Now before I begin, even though I’m sure this will be ignored; I personally have no problem with female protagonists. A good number of my favorite games feature not only a female protagonist, but some feature a cast that’s mostly female. Nor do I have a problem with females in the real world. My problem exists with how they present their problem and their answer. The main problem I see with this issue is that there’s no core or central focus of feminism at large; anyone can claim feminism and then cite their beliefs as doctrine. To put it in words that carry more weight then my own, let’s see what the Encyclopedia Brittanica has to say on the topic and their lack of focus.
“While NOW focused on issues of women’s rights, the more radical groups pursued the broader themes of women’s liberation. Although they lacked the kind of coherent, national structure NOW had formed, the more radical women’s liberation groups—as opposed to women’s rights groups—sprang up in Chicago, Toronto, Seattle, Detroit, and elsewhere. Suddenly, the women’s liberation movement was everywhere—and nowhere. It had no officers, no mailing address, no printed agenda. What it did have was attitude…”
“Responding to these diverse interests, NOW called the Congress to Unite Women, which drew more than 500 feminists to New York City in November 1969. The meeting was meant to establish common ground between the radical and moderate wings of the women’s movement, but it was an impossible task. Well-dressed professionals convinced that women needed to reason with men could not unite with wild-haired radicals whose New Left experience had soured them on polite discourse with “the enemy.” NOW’s leadership seemed more comfortable lobbying politicians in Washington or corresponding with NASA about the exclusion of women from the astronaut program, while the young upstarts preferred disrupting legislative committee hearings. NOW leaders were looking for reform; the more radical women were plotting a revolution.” – Elinor Burkett, Encyclopedia Brittanica
So even back in the the 1960’s the feminist were a fractured community at best. There were various sects, all with what I imagine was their own interpretation of feminism. While this doesn’t seem damaging as a whole, it’s mostly the extreme/radical version of feminism that seems to be populating the videogame community. Since there is no unified meaning, the radicals all have their own ideas and while they may be somewhat unified in their own beliefs; they’re willing to attack and shame anyone who doesn’t agree to their ideas. This can easily lead to confusion as if you were ask any feminist what she believes, it cannot carry over to another. Granted every community has tenants who don’t agree fully with their beliefs; but when that community is so fractured, even attempting to understand it can be a chore most people probably would not want to go through.
So now we have radicals such as Anita Sarkeesian who back in 2012, used Kickstarter to fund a video series that she still hasn’t completed; despite receiving over twenty-six times her requested funding. There was also a piece of fanfiction that involves Anita Sarkeesian and Spiderman killing Randy Pitchford. A story that makes me think of Valerie Solanas; the woman who wrote the SCUM Manifesto and then attempted murder on Andy Warhol by shooting him in the chest. Keep in mind Valerie Solanas was a reknowned feminist and her SCUM Manifesto called for eugenics to reduce the male population.
There are also radicals like Brenna Hillier who devotes an entire paragraph to insulting videogame players (therefore her readers) in her DmC: Devil May Cry review, as well as writing a rant about Deep Down not having a playable female character and ending it with what I assume is feminist fan fiction. Not to leave men out, there’s Ben Kuchera and while he hasn’t done anything psychotic in the name of feminism (yet); he’s a proud supporter and while in a fit of journalistic integrity, publicly attacked Erik Kain and wished Kain’s career to be damaged. Keep in mind, Ben Kuchera writes for a videogame website; while Erik Kain write for Forbes Magazine for fucks sake.
You may ask why am I bringing all this up. Well, because whether they’re trying to put themselves in a higher position or they are sitting in that position already, they are a type of spokespeople for the videogame community in a way. Do you know of any publication that would want one of their writers to say this not just to, but about their readers of all people?
“According to this measure, the “gamer” kind is sexist; racist; homophobic; reactionary; unable to spell; almost exclusively male; hasn’t read a book since See Spot Run; probably dramatically under-equipped in the genital department; incapable of basic self-care like hygiene, cooking and housework; and covered in Cheeto dust.” – Brenna Hillier, DmC: Devil May Cry “fans” are a crying shame
Why the fuck would I want some egotistical bitch like that to represent me or even give credit to her work? You’re not just a representative for the piece of shit website you write for, you’re a journalist who should be an inbetween for people who play videogames and the developers. Not just that, but when writing for your readers, you should keep your audience in mind. Keep insulting your readers and then be sure to cry foul when they get pissed off at you. So how about Ben Kuchera who wanted Erik Kain’s career to be hurt? Sadly twitter doesn’t have the tweets current (or I really suck at finding archives), but I do have a few screenshots of some of the exchange.
Huh, looking over those I just noticed Erik Kain giving it the old “Say it to my face.” I knew I read Forbes for a reason. But to continue on, even without feminism, people who hold a position of power and influence act fucking horrible. These are the same people who want to extol their virtues onto others about behaving, and then go on to bad mouth a fellow writer; one who writes at a more prestigious publication I might add. Yes it’s kinda funny to see assholes like that get pissy, but at the same time these are the people who not only bring news but hold a level of influence in the community (even if it’s a small one). Insulting your audience, attacking a fellow writer, then having the nerve to tell others to grow up; you should be ashamed of yourselves. If anyone else did that, they’d be labeled as a troll, a misogynist, or a plethora of other adjectives and possibly banned from the website in question.
While I could go on, I have only one more for now. Just today there’s Samantha Allen who in a fit of emotion, lamented that the website Giantbomb.com recently hired a white guy for a writing position. When someone approached her about maybe that person was the most qualified, she promptly replied “Go fuck yourself.”
https://twitter.com/CousinDangereux/statuses/483812175942025216
Now, I am far from the most professional people alive and love causing discord, that’s why my twitter account uses a handle and not my real name and such. However, she did this on her personal twitter where everyone can see it. Why I don’t entirely fault her on the original exchange, what happened afterwards only cause a lot more damage. There were plenty of people attacking her, as well as plenty of people coming to her defense; when it was all said and done, it appears she’ll quit writing about videogames because the community is too toxic. Now to be fair, everytime I see this feminist shit pop up I try to approach it with an open mind, hoping the person isn’t going to be radical as fuck. Nor do I condone a lot of insults that get levied at the feminists who bring this shit up; rape’s fucking disgusting and telling any woman they should be violated like that is fucking rotten. So I am not entirely without sympathy for her… but then I did some digging and most of it went away once I found a nice little piece on her tumblr.
http://unpitchable.tumblr.com/post/79931857273/what-misandry-means-to-me
The link is currently unavailable because either she took it down or put it on private, but that’s okay because I got it in picture form. Just click on the three thumbnails below to read what she wrote. They’re in sequential order so just click them in order.
Her level of misandry is so great it cannot be contained by a fridge magnet. Now, for those of you who don’t want to do a dictionary search; according to Merriam-Webster misandry is “a hatred of men.” That’s very succinct. Now to put additional information into the equation; the person bitching about the hiring apparently didn’t even put in an attempt to be hired there; but was angry about the lack of minorities being hired.
https://twitter.com/CousinDangereux/status/484081826370441216
So it’s not just who was hired, but apparently structural inequality. Now I’m not a business owner or a business major, but I do understand that being in business revolves around making money. Making money has many factors, but one of which would be having the most qualified candidates. Every job has different metrics to gauge what’s qualified, so I’m not going to attempt to get in on that. So in this case I’m having to take the business defense side, because as a business they want people who can pull in money and not cost them money. This is where I take issue with people wanting diversity; the plaintiff relies on another to make what could be a costly decision.
When hiring someone you’re not just looking at their resume or skillset; you’re looking at their behavior, mannerisms, and other factors because this person needs to be a good fit with your current workers. You don’t want to hire someone to only have them be abrasive to your current workers; nor would you want them to walk-out on the job. Hiring is a costly and timely affair, and hiring based on diversity instead of what would be best for the company would be foolishness at best; because they may be hiring a resource sink that may end in litigation or several of their proven workers leaving. If that is to happen, the business may no longer be fiscally viable and go out of business. So do forgive me for sounding callous, but hiring based on diversity and not on skillset can be dangerous to a business.
I bring this up because what Samantha Allen seems to be mad about is the staff not being diverse enough and is compelled to bitch about the hiring choice. To which I’d have to ask her, who all applied for the job and how she knows since I doubt she was privy to the information about the candidates. Maybe someone she knows applied, sure that’s possible and she was just tweeting her anger. Now at the same time I don’t agree with all the shit she got thrown at her, but like hell I do feel bad that she’ll quit writing about videogames.
Now, I know this seems petty and while I doubt many will agree with me (and I’m perfectly fine with that) it has to be said. Videogames are already a diverse community, just not in the eyes of feminist or other self-victimizing parties. I will concede that they’re toxic, especially towards females, but at the same time I have to chalk that up to the anonymity of the internet. I say this because in all the arcades I’ve been to, yes females were scarce compared to males. However, I rarely, very rarely, VERY FUCKING RARELY ever saw anyone treat any woman the way they get treated now. We never had this problem when playing a game meant standing anywhere from shoulder-to-shoulder to not even six inches away from each other. Women were a minority, but those who could brave the arcade and bring it, they were welcomed, they got respect, and were rarely fucked with. Those who did get fucked with, they had a room full of people who’d bounce an asshole when shit got out of hand.
I don’t have the answer for the problem of women being treated like shit, mostly because policing the internet is tougher than it sounds; but this aggressive brand of feminism is not the solution and has no business trying to be in the community. The writers at Polygon, Kotaku, and other sites may claim feminism can only lead to a positive experience. It may sound good in theory, but then you see shit like this.
http://lil-purrfect-femme.tumblr.com/post/88786686393/i-heard-this-the-other-day-and-its-pretty-accurate
If the link all of a sudden becomes unavailable, check the thumbnail for what was said.
Now look at that and tell me if you see something suspicious. If you’re not thinking along the same line as I am, let me point it out. This is the writing of an alleged Psychology Major. Do tell me where someone with that fucking mentality would be able to do more help than harm. Do tell me, is this the line of thinking the videogame community should have? Or more importantly, is this the kind of thinking a psychology major should have? What if she wants to become a therapist? What if she wants to become a professor for a college? Do you not think her biases won’t translate over into anything she’s a part of? To get off the more serious note; imagine her writing for a videogame website. Do you think she’d be able to restrain her bias?
Most website writers can’t contain their personal bias, while some writers (like those at Kotaku) can’t even write an article; opting to make their “article” with nothing but a video and random quotes/facts without an original thought aside from the headline. That is not journalism, that’s publishing your references or cliffnotes. I’m not saying that game journalism was always competent; but before the internet, when things were restrained by a page count, their staff had to show competency beyond what journalists/writers do now. When I find myself more critical of the article itself instead of the writers intent; you’ve failed as a writer and you should be ashamed of yourself. I’m not a good writer and my exposure to professional journalism was a class I took in eleventh grade. So when I find myself disgusted with what websites are putting out, yes I’m gonna be critical of them.
https://twitter.com/Kheapathic/status/485475541378547712
So, what I’m trying to say in this really long thought process is; adults who played videogames (and still do) in their childhood have grown up. There’s been good and there’s been bad, victories and defeats, love and heartache, riches and squalor. I’m sure many older game players have the same feeling, we’ve watched something we love evolve as a form, but at the same time degrade into something worse. It wasn’t just the internet, it wasn’t the herd of twelve year olds who just discovered swear words, it wasn’t just loud mouths with their social agendas either. While there are many things that can take some of the blame, the problem I see is that the problem isn’t just the nameless community but the people at top. There are still a lot of people who rely on the websites and publications for information. The problem is these sources have lax standards and infested with people who have agendas outside of reporting or critiquing. While I’ll admit the community as a whole is a problem, the people with a voice will demand you behave and spit venom at the same time. If we want videogames to grow up, the people with a voice need to practice what they preach or stand aside for those who can.
You all have a good day.
References
Burkett, E. (2013, March 11). women’s movement (political and social movement). Encyclopedia Britannica Online. Retrieved July 1, 2014, from http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/647122/womens-movement
Hillier, B. (2013, January 15). DmC: Devil May Cry “fans” are a crying shame. VG247 DmC Devil May Cry fans are a crying shame Comments. Retrieved July 2, 2014, from http://www.vg247.com/2013/01/15/dmc-devil-may-cry-fans-are-a-crying-shame/
Hillier, B. (2014, February 17). Deep Down the rabbit hole of ingrained games industry sexism. VG247.com. Retrieved July 1, 2014, from http://www.vg247.com/2014/02/17/deep-down-the-rabbit-hole-of-ingrained-games-industry-sexism/
Peterson, S. (2014, July 5). This Week In The Business: Creative Immaturity. Kotaku. Retrieved July 5, 2014, from http://kotaku.com/this-week-in-the-business-creative-immaturity-1600488571
Sarkeesian, A. (2012, June 16). Tropes vs. Women in Video Games. Kickstarter. Retrieved July 1, 2014, from https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/566429325/tropes-vs-women-in-video-games?ref=nav_search
Khea's Ramblings 